I have been on meds since Friday and the last 2 days I haven’t felt as down as I have been. Odd seeing the fact my husband is leaving me. I have had a few side effects from the meds. Feeling sick and dizzy. Currently my legs is twitching not sure is a side effect though as they felt a little like jelly a few moments ago.
They say it usually takes 2 to 3 weeks for meds to start working. Some will see a quicker result then others. Some with have to try a number of different ones before finding the right one for them. I’m not sure my mood is a result of the meds or a results of maybe accepting the fact my husband no longer wants to be with me. It still hurts very much so don’t get me wrong. He has someone to go to, I don’t. I don’t find it easy to meet people as it is so finding someone who will be there to take care of me at my worse is going to be hard.
I had a doctors appointment this morning just to see how I am coping with everything and how I am doing so far on the meds. To get to my doctors I have to show ID as I live on a base. The guy I had to show my ID to had the most piercing blue eyes, I love blue eyes. He had a cute smile too, Well was cute all over really.
You are probably thinking, is it not too soon to be seeing others that way?
Well yea it kinda is but the way I see it is that the soon to be ex husband pretty much has someone lined up so there is no harm in me looking. Besides I saw him eye me up and take a double look, surprising really because I had no make up on and it was fairly windy so my hair was a mess, so I pretty much looked a mess. I don’t know, seeing him in the corner of my eyes taking a double look at me, him smiling at me like he did I guess made me feel a bit better about myself. If you have read previous posts from me you’ll know I suffer quite badly with confidence issues. I’ll never see him, well chances are slim and even if I did nothing would ever happen, my ID says I am married, but on hand I am left handed and show everything with my left hand. What am I thinking? It’s too early to be thinking about this. I just don’t want to be alone. I’ve never lived on my own before so it’s a whole new world to me.